Hey guys, how are you? 🙂 The awesome rainy weather of these days forces me not to do anything else than just chill on my comfortable sofa with liters of hot tea. This is the ideal situation to speak with you about a serious topic that creates a few wrinkles on foreheads of lots of people including me. However, lots of them do not realize that something is wrong with their situations because they just got used to such treatment. By this article, I want to show you on my personal situations that such behaviour is not right and acceptable.
Toxic person. No, I am not talking about a guy with green skin and death in his eyes because of drinking poison. (Although it would be suitable as Halloween is aproaching.) The one that you consider to be your best friend, close buddy or the only one human being in the whole planet who you can unlimitedly trust. However, they do not behave to you as normal friends do and sometimes we cannot see it. We keep vehemently excusing that person in front of others, even in front of ourselves. And this excusing, my darlings – this is not good at all. You should definitely not say to yourself and others “Nah, that is how she is, she will not change, this is typical for her.” Yeah, people have different personalities and sometimes they make a mistake and behave badly to each other. But as soon as they are like this on a daily basis or almost the whole time you are together, then you do not have a usual loving friend. And I am sorry for that. (And this was not a sarcasm.)
Signs of Toxic People
- They do not apologize. Did they do something wrong? Insult you, hurt you, eat the last bar of chocolate? Did they say “sorry”? Of course not, or with a huge ammount of sarcasm in their voice. The result? You are sad and mad about them while they immediately forget about it.
- You have to prove they are your priority. Have an anniversary with your boyfriend (or bae, whatever you want)? Family celebration, dinner with the president? You must cancel it as soon as they call you, because you have to spend your time only with them. Any other action means you hate them completely.
- Their attitude towards you may change during minutes. You are laughing together and having a great time, but suddenly they start to act irritatedly as if you did or said something wrong – although you did not. They want you to feel insecure and to always question yourself how the hell did you hurt them.
- Manipulation. They beg you to come to their house where they speak only about themselves not even asking how is your day, while you have to study, work or get your dog to the nearest vet. But as soon as you need them because of being depressed, they suddenly cannot cancel daylong marathon of American Horror Story.
- Criticism is their daily bread. This aspect is also connected with jealousy and the disability to celebrate your own happiness. You wear something nice, did an amazing makeup or just received a erfect job opportunity and you are ready to share your happiness with them, but they just look at you with lift eyebrows while saying: “So what? And by the way, your right eyeliner is exatly 0.00012 millimetres longer than your left one.”
- They always talk about themselves. You and your problems are not important. Wait, why should you have any problems? You are the chosen one who can have them in your life, you lucky ingrate!
- In front of others, you have to be humiliated. Otherwise they feel uncomfortable and mad because there is no way you could be the most liked and adored one when they are nearby.
- They tell others your secrets…and totally exaggerate them. Others cannot like you! You must sound as an old alcoholic with more lovers than Henry VIII. had. They do not let you to be better than they are.
Did you find one of your friends in these situations? I hope that not because it means you have to remove them from your life unless you want to end totally alone, broken and destroyed. But the ways how to treat such people will be the topic of another article. 🙂